ORANGE MINTY BOONGAH DIPS... FROM ASDA

Julia came round to my flat the evening before my disciplinary hearing.
"I just came to give you my support for tomorrow," she said.
"Oh thanks," I said.
"And to give you a bit of a warning," she added.
"Oh?" I said, "What about?"
"Well," she said, looking concerned, "some of the Board of Governors are against you being reinstated to your post. They think it will send out the wrong message."
I was puzzled and I made a puzzled sort of face.
"Some of them were against your kind being there in the first place and
they're just using this misunderstanding as an excuse to get rid of you. I've mobilized the support of my colleagues and with our help, you might just get off"
"My... kind?" I said. I was more puzzled and my facial expression became puzzleder.
"You know..." she said, "gay."
"But I'm not..." I said.
"You're not?" she seemed genuinely surprised.
"No," I said, "I thought that was obvious after that time you caught me with those porno mags and the time you saw me with Sadie and Sukie and the bucket of piss..."
"I thought you were just over-compensating," she said, "oh well, just goes to show even the least likely people can surprise you from time to time. Anyway, best of luck with it."
"Thanks for your support," I said as she walked out.
She didn't say anything, she just gave a little laugh.